Dogged Persistance - Keeps you Moving Forward:

7 May 2015

Tags: event, cardio, bootcamp sydney,

If you're a sucker for the snooze button and need a little extra motivation to get you through the winter read on to hear how Rushcutter's Evolutionary and Run Club leader Barton Tanner survived the mental and physical barriers of a 100km race in the worst of Sydney weather on ANZAC Day.

As most of you are aware, last weekend I participated in the ANZAC Day 100km Running event. After months of preparation both physically and mentally, the day had arrived where I was going to be tested like never before. This test was not necessarily one of physical prowess rather, it turned out to be a mental battle that started before I had even reached the race starting line.

The race was intended to start at St Ives Show Ground, do 2 out and back loops of 27km and 40km, then have a 33km leg to the finish line at Manly damn. But this was not to be, with 2 days notice, wild weather meant that the trails were closed and the event turned into loops that made up 100km. 155 loops of a 600m track around the soccer field at St Ives Show Ground to be exact. This change to the event appeared to be the first of many challenges to come, obviously becoming a very different physical and mental challenge than what I had prepared for.

So on Saturday 25th I got to the start line at St Ives where I would spend the next 16 hours at best (24 hours at worst), looping this track. My spirits were very high. People often ask why would you put yourself through something like this, what is the point in running these distances? Anyone who has ever entered an endurance event can understand. You do it because you KNOW that at some point in the race you are going to struggle, you are going to be stripped raw, you're going to be stuck in a battle between yourself and the most honest chatters of your mind that ask you one simple question; "Are you good enough?". It is in these primitive moments where your mind is doing everything it possibly can to stop you from taking the next step, that you have the 'Ahha' moment. The ultimate epiphany that you can only get from being in these situations.

After the 'Last Post' was played, the countdown started and the start gun went bang, I was ready. Months of anticipation waiting to see what my mind threw at me and what great insight into my life I was about to receive. The mental battle was surly going to be huge - I was running around the same circle for at very least 16 hours! Yet as the hours clocked back and the laps slowly got tipped off I started to realise something. I wasn't feeling the mental battle that I wanted. Usually it takes about 3 hours and the voices start to chirp, you suppress them for another couple of ours but by 5 hours they are loud and the self doubt and lessons begin.

Not today - there was nothing. My feet are sore and after 30km my hammy was burning. But nothing in my head.

'It's ok' I thought, they will come. I will get the lesson and life will slap me in the face with all my troubles and everything that I am doing wrong. Just give it time.

At 60km I start vomiting, can't keep anything in my system. In an endurance race this is very dangerous. Endurance races are often explained as a nutrition race with a bit of exercise. Food dictates everything, are you going to cramp, do you have energy, can your body work. Surely now my mind should be racing. Surely now doubt is going to set in, my deepest darkest fears are going to squash me like a bug and spit me out in a blubbery mess of despair. But NOTHING - My mind is numb!

It wasn't until about lap 110 that I realised what my lesson for the day was. Nothing but a grind. That I was here grinding away, shuffling slowly towards something that means nothing to anyone else but me. I could simply sit down and no one cares, I could never put myself through anything like this and no one would care. Life is nothing but a series of conflicts between the right way and the easy way. Every day we wake up and have the choice to aimlessly wonder or to challenge ourselves and strive to achieve. At 5:30am, your hand can't make it to the alarm clock before the voices in your head start telling you that it's too early, too dark, too cold to get out of bed and that you can just train tomorrow. But every morning you turn up to training you are saying to those voices, I am stronger than you. Every single one of us possesses the strength to attempt something that you're not sure you can accomplish. It is in this attempt that we find out what is we are made of. There is no music or cheering crowd at the finish line. You may be lucky enough to have people supporting you like I did (thanks Barry O'Leary for coming and running with me, was a great 90min), but they are more supporting out of love than they are supporting you out of admiration or want to give you a sponsorship deal/get your autograph. It was at this point that I understood one of my favourite Scott Jurek quotes - Vegan Ultramarathoner who was the best in the world for around 10 years:

"If you run long enough, that tends to happen. Whatever quantitative measures of success you set out to achieve becomes either unattainable or meaningless. The reward of running - or anything - lies within us... We focus on something external to motivate us, but we need to remember it is the process of reaching for the prize - not the prize itself - that can bring us peace and joy"